Tonight’s Private Practice episode left me feeling, I don’t know- nostalgic, scared of the future maybe? This woman broke her own waters at 27 weeks, putting her baby at a number of risks, mainly death, to save the life of her dying son. While I can see the reasons for doing this, the sze of this little girl tugged at my heart strings. It is hard to imagine that I too was that tiny ( born at 24 weeks) and came ot of it on the other side- ALIVE and healthy, after a long intial struggle.

Making that decision as a parent mst be the most difficlut decision on earth to make- to put the life of your unborn child at risk for the chance of saving your existing child…and ultimaley risk the lives of both. It was a confronting episode, both as a premature baby and as a loss mum. I am glad that my baby did not suffer pain and slipped away peacefully.

My thoughts are coming out so jumbled and confused. I do not mean for my thoughts to come across as nasty or that I did not appreciate the footsteps my daughter left behind. Or that do not feel for other parents…I hope I do not come across that way. I believe I am just in a different frame of mind now.

Still no period…