I am, admittedly, a people pleaser. I go out of my way to ensure that people aren’t given a reason to dislike me. I think I have blogged about this before, and this obsession with pleasing others stems from horrific bullying throughout my childhood and well into my late teens.

After putting my foot in it yesterday, I’ve felt a huge, overwhelming range of emotions- and not the good ones.

All directed at myself.

I feel ashamed

I feel angry

I feel guilty

I feel stupid

I’ve struggled last night with a tighness in my chest, remembering to take deep breaths, I’ve been feeling dizzy, I have been feeling on the verge of a very severe panic attack, all because I know that I have upset someone.

I’ve woken up today with a headache and a heavy heart.